I did not expect them to tell me that!

I was hurt..! I did not expect them to tell that! What hurt me most was the fact that they did not tell it in front of me. I just heard it from others.. It is alright if they are not professional, just like the people in the squatters area... but they are people who deserve to be respected, persons with authority both by the public and religious sectors.....

Anyway. I do not have to follow what they say about me. I simply do not care. My life belongs to me, not by them, neither my parents nor my brother.. It's my life. My decisions were carefully thought, and if ever, by chance, i made a wrong decision, it will be me who will pay the price, not them..

I am sure that they will soon pay the price of putting words in my mouth. Of putting myself in a box.

Experience of the Holy?

I'm glad that my nephew is now part of the Christian family. We just went to the church to welcome him as he received the Sacrament of Baptism.

I know for myself that by the time I left the seminary, I also left behind its walls the values, teachings and virtues I learned. I am now in the process of unlearning. Forgetting everything -can I do it? I'll try.- And try to get lost in the wilderness I thought was not existing.

I am trying to unlearn them all, to empty myself and to start inserting some new unconventional thoughts and principles. But was my experience a religious experience? I was observing the rite on which the priests poured water on the head of my nephew. I was so distracted by my duty as the 'official photographer' that I was not able to focus so much on the essentials.

But when I saw that very important part everything around me paused. And everything I tried to unlearn was back. Some feelings or emotions or something I cannot explain happened to me. As if I had a religious experience, the experience of the Holy. Speaking to me in the events. Was there something in the event that I need to ponder upon, to reflect, or worse to

I Want Christmas Dead!

I want Christmas to die! really... I am not talking on Christmas as a celebration of the birth of our Savior.. No not this one...

I am pertaining to the Christmas we celebrate... The Christmas that frustrates others. The Christmas that only the haves have... and the have nots cannot celebrate... Not necessarily the haves financially.. yes it can be but not only them but also the ones who have the conventional and ideal Christmas.

Why should we really have to celebrate Christmas 'white'. As the song goes, 'I'm dreaming of a white Christmas'... It is not for us Filipinos... Its for the Westerners who hates the burden of the biting cold of winter!

I pray that the Christmas we celebrate will die soon!!! and we will resurrect the Christmas as it was and as it should be....